How to Spot the 7 Types of Inner Critic
The Inner Critic is actually not a single part of you; there can be a number of critical voices that judge you in different ways or for different reasons.
image by Ellen Von Wiegand
It is a strange thing to acknowledge that everyone has a voice in their head, especially when we realise that this private monologue can sometimes be our own worst enemy.
The inner critic is something we all have. It has been our ingrained, habituated thinking for so long that it tends to become background noise; something we don’t question or see as a problem. In small doses, self-criticism can be useful; it tells us where we’ve gone wrong and what we need to do to make things right. But when this voice becomes meaner and more vocal, it can have the opposite effect. These regular (sometimes daily) acts of self-sabotage have been linked to anxiety and depression and even obsessive-compulsive behaviours, addiction, stress and burnout.
Ironically, the inner critic thinks it is being helpful. In its own harsh way it is trying to keep us safe. But at the same time, the inner critic expects only the best from us. In their study of the inner critic, Psychologists Jay Earley and Bonnie Weiss identified 7 types of inner critic. Each type has a different intention and strategy, so here is a breakdown of each one so you can identify which critic is affecting you.
1. The Perfectionist
This critic tries to get you to do everything perfectly because it doesn’t want you to be judged or criticised. It attacks you by saying that mistakes and flaws are unacceptable, which makes it hard to finish projects.
The Perfectionist usually says:
“Try harder”
“You’re not going to leave it like that, are you?”
2. The Task Master
This critic pushes you very hard to accomplish a lot. It wants you to work hard and be successful. It fears that you may be mediocre or lazy and will be judged a failure.
The Task Master usually says:
“You’re so lazy”
“You won’t achieve anything in life unless you start working harder”
3. The Conformist
This critic doesn’t allow for individuality and wants you to fit a mould that comes from society, your family or culture. It attacks you for not acting in a certain way and prevents your free expression.
The conformist usually says:
“What will other people think?”
“Don’t make a fool of yourself!”
4. The Controller
This critic tries to control impulsive acts and prevent pleasurable, decadent or addictive behaviour that might not be good for you, such as overeating, drinking, or sexual activity. It fears that you will get out of control.
The Controller usually says:
“You have no willpower!”
“You will never break free from this”
5. The Underminer
This critic is very uncomfortable with risk. It tries to undermine your self-esteem and wants you to stay small to avoid failing, being hurt, judged or rejected.
The Underminer usually says:
“Don’t even try because you’ll fail anyway”
“What’s the point?”
6. The Guilt Tripper
This critic is stuck in the past. It’s unable to forgive you for wrongs you have done or people you have hurt. It tried to protect you from repeating past mistakes by making sure you never forget or feel free.
The Guilt Tripper usually says:
“She will never forgive you for this!”
“How could you have done that?”
7. The Destroyer
This critic depresses you, making pervasive attacks on your self-worth and shaming you. It makes you feel inherently flawed and not entitled to basic understanding/respect.
The Destroyer usually says:
“You should never have been born”
“You’re worthless”
As you read this list, you might have an inkling which inner critic is loudest for you. Perhaps, like me, you experience more than one depending on the situation.
Unfortunately, there’s no switch to completely turn off negative thoughts, but sometimes the key to taking back control is simply to acknowledge the inner critic’s presence. Just being mindful of the inner critic’s motivation can be a powerful way to stop negative thoughts from turning into more destructive behaviours.
